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mind your business and get off my back

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mind your business and get off my back

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We have repeated lectures on time-wastage, and are monitored for same.

One of my coworkers has amused himself by walking down the aisles, and saying, "Does our boss know you're doing that?"

Thing is, one of the aspects I hate MOST of office existence is that Big Brother feeling.  I don't like reminders of it; I resent them, and when he does this, I resent him.

I've snapped at him for it a couple of times, and I am not the only one in the department who has done so.

Right now, I am on my lunch break, and looking at the internet.  He just walked by and said, sotto voce, "she's coming."

I said, in irritation, "I'm on lunch."

Turns out THIS time he was actually trying to warn me.  Oh.

I tried telling him that he keeps getting snapped at for this because it makes us feel like we're being watched - and we already KNOW we are, and hate having to feel like it as well - but his injured bafflement at my "unjust treatment" clearly made him unable to hear further from me - he took his hurt feelings back to his cubicle.

Thing is, whether he's helping or teasing, either makes it obvious that HE IS WATCHING ME.  I'm never going to be sanguine with that in a place where being watched bears consequences I can't control.  I've been reported before (for things like sleeping - when I wasn't; or wearing socks that don't match the dress code - which I guess I was, but still, get a life, people), and I don't trust those who do the watching.

I am tired of everyone in the world.

*edited to add*

In the three hours since I wrote this, he has stopped at my neighbor's cubicle and announced, "I'm just here to see what you're doing," no less than four times.

I'm not tired of everyone in the world, after all.  It's just him.

*more edit*

In a way, I wish I hadn't written about this.  It will blow over, even if it takes weeks.  However, I wish it could just be talked out rather than "gotten over" - it's ridiculous how unable people are to talk.  If I press the issue, though, I become pushy, an aggressor, and obsessive.  *annoyed face*

My neighbor told me he thinks I am "wrong".  I AM in the wrong for snapping.  My combatant is in the wrong for prancing around to make sure I know how he feels.  Criticism can hurt, and sometimes it's wrong, but sometimes  it's someone drawing attention to your own flaws - which is an opportunity to try to eliminate them.  That's how I try to see it, anyway.  Sometimes I fail at that, but some people never seem to take it as anything but an attack.  Anyway, how much can it possibly matter to him what I say?  We're just coworkers, and not close.  *shrug*

I'm in analytical mode, because this is bothering me a bit more than it should.  Overall, I am torn between being amused at the childishness of all this, and irritated.

Irritated is winning, which is a shame.  I'd rather not be irritable, but right now I am.

Because I am grumpy, I'm want to assert that this is all a function of having a stupid office job - even though I know it is really a function of how human beings work when in close proximity with others who are fairly incompatible.

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