polymorphism (polymorphism) wrote,
polymorphism
polymorphism

What's the word?

So.

I was feeling... I dunno.

I saw someone with something I wanted. I didn't want him not to have it; I didn't want the same exact thing he wanted - I didn't want to take his. Seeing him with it just reminded me of my desire, and reawakened that desire, and made me want to go look for one of my own (aside: this feeling often arises on first encounters with tech stuff and other toys).

I had been looking for a word for this feeling before, and now here I was again. Jealousy; envy; covetousness: these carry such negative connotations, and there really isn't a negative aspect in this feeling I'm having. I don't want it instead of him; I want it too. There's no "green-eyed monster" here. I wish him well. I also wish myself well. I want ice cream for everyone!

Hi, Roget!

The word I've tentatively chosen is "desiderate". It's infrequently used, in fact I've never heard it used in this form that I recall. The only association I have with it at all is that whole "You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars" thing: new-age, clunky, overwrought and schmaltzy... and the time it took me to think of and type those adjectives is probably the largest number of consecutive seconds I've spent thinking about the Desiderada since the very first time I read it. I think it's safe to say that it doesn't loom large in my life.

So, my vocab geekiness fed, my hunger to express myself better sated... I feel pretty good. I probably won't use it much, certainly not to overuse; I won't be obnoxious... or, hmm, perhaps I shouldn't promise that... Anyway, now I just need to learn how to use my shiny new word. One thing I don't adore about internet dictionaries is that few of them seem to exhibit the word being defined in the context of a sentence anymore. Then again, maybe that just says something about the kinds of words I look up.

No matter. Right now, I feel like I deserve a reward; I'm really desiderating some ice cream.
Tags: geeky, language
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